我看了一整季，沒有一個高中小孩在學(xué)習(xí)！劇中的小孩們基本上就是磕藥，蹦迪，亂搞，抑郁，有一點少年強說愁，美式青春傷痛文學(xué)？ 我覺得這尼瑪美國人矯情，沒作業(yè)就閑的磕藥亂搞，然后編劇就會打補丁，那個啥，人家小時候童年不幸。其實也不管幸不幸福，變性磕藥太潮了，要想高中生活圓滿還是要瞎整的。很美式。 以下是一些奇怪吐槽 1nate演員演技真不錯，演出了一個活脫脫的變態(tài)老陰b。 2Maddy全劇中我唯一希望成為惡女花魁的人物，（不喜歡學(xué)習(xí)就喜歡變美和亂搞）最后變成戀愛腦？？？ 3劇中眼妝都不錯，感覺就像全員美妝博主（比那個營銷棒子好多了）導(dǎo)演喜歡放歌，從來不切，一放就放整首。導(dǎo)演適合拍mv。 4nate他爸，妥妥的hot daddy，太頂了。這種大叔跟兒子nate兩個人二選一我覺得難分伯仲，還會做辣椒醬，開始腦補他爸只穿圍裙漏屁股做飯：“daddy！全炫我嘴里！” 5，美國家長沒有一個人跟孩子說你不好好學(xué)習(xí)，將來就得去電子廠打工早婚早育生一窩崽。我想這是因為美國的家長本身自己也很混亂，管理不好自己的生活。不過我覺得他們是盡力了，就像我一直期待他們說說孩子學(xué)習(xí)的事情，但是她們反而是在戀愛生活方面給了更多建議，就比如Maddy她媽，說什么也不同意，女兒和一個暴力打女人的在一起。女主角的媽媽天天給女兒做尿檢（說女兒是運動員所以要尿檢我也信） 6假正經(jīng)邁凱被男同學(xué)沖了被爆那段sorry我真笑了，然后看到他哭的很傷心，我心想你是男寶你不吃虧～好兄弟們跟你鬧著玩兒呢～然后邁凱站起來抖擻精神又man了，想想咋么掩飾自己的無能？只能跟女友說“來，脫衣服接著干”笑死我了 7Cassie這女的真的讓我覺得太戀愛腦真有大病。就是和賤男親熱馬上要整了，這女的說“對不起我想起我有男友”搞毛？要是我我也煩。然后和假正經(jīng)的男友說我懷孕了。男友直接說“那咋整我還是學(xué)生…”女的說“啊沒事兒我就說說”然后哭了。我整個人大無語，Cassie這種女孩真的好有病。對sex太隨意了就是這樣，然后又聽男的話，讓干啥干啥，這種女孩討好型人格，傻的一批。最后下場很慘的。 8kat在這些女孩里還挺拉好感的。改變了自己想法變超自信。然后跟男的說“別逼逼要干就快點干”自己爽了生活就爽了。kat真是個女王

9全員氣泡音。有時候他們說話，臺詞又很矯情，我懷疑我在刷TikTok看土味視頻。無數(shù)次懷疑演員故意的，壓低聲音裝深沉。

最后：這電視劇注定要火，頂流贊達(dá)亞，變性人做主角的噱頭，HBO一如既往的大尺度，還有blingbling的爆閃眼妝。沖著這美妝它就得火

希望《亢奮》第二季一定要多拍拍我們lexi的故事哦(′-ω-`)第二遍看cassie那一集的時候，就更多注意的是我lexi了。cassie小時候爸爸培養(yǎng)了她成為滑冰運動員的夢想，那么lexi或許也曾或者一直有著不平凡的夢嗎？面對不負(fù)責(zé)任且有drug沉迷史的父親，有點古怪且酗酒但很愛女兒們的母親，cassie成長得非常善良單純但又有些懦弱。而且其實很明顯地感覺得到父母和親戚們更喜歡更關(guān)注cassie，因為lexi沒有cassie漂亮出眾，顯得非常平凡。lexi大部分的出現(xiàn)都是在cassie的后面和背景里，汽車座位cassie坐的是副駕駛，lexi坐后面。甚至關(guān)于lexi的個人故事，我們更多的不是從她的家人口中，而是從RUE那里知道的，而且也非常非常少。在她對cassie發(fā)飆說，你很漂亮，一直都是，從小到大人們不都是這樣告訴你的嗎。但是lexi從來沒有自卑過，事實上也從來沒有抱怨過。

其實在這樣復(fù)雜的環(huán)境下長大，被冷落被無視，可是還是成長為了一個健康明朗的平凡女孩，就已經(jīng)是一件非常不平凡非?？岬氖铝?。況且lexi非常特立獨行非常有個性。第六集的化妝舞會，大家都費盡心思打扮得漂亮的時候，她辦成了一個六十歲的瘋子畫家。她媽媽說，你這個年紀(jì)的年輕女孩有幾個會打扮成這樣？我想只有l(wèi)exi會這樣，會不顧別人的嘲笑，不在意自己是否艷壓全場得到男生的青睞，只打扮成自己喜歡的樣子。在某中程度上，lexi是亢奮里最酷的女孩子呀。

RUE說她是因為三觀不合和lexi疏遠(yuǎn)的。真的是這樣嗎？RUE也還是把lexi放在心上的，所以會邀請她出來滑冰補償她?？墒腔蛟SRUE也從來沒有發(fā)現(xiàn)過lexi的不平凡之處。我總覺得lexi可以成為RUE的力量。畢竟lexi的初吻是給了RUE的呀，畢竟在RUE孤獨和需要幫助的時候，lexi從來不會拒絕。而且LEXI作為大家的情感咨詢師，雖然每次回答都帶著些蠢萌，但其實都是一語中的。特別是第六集，LEXI真是操碎了心。先是提醒RUE保護她妹妹，之后發(fā)現(xiàn)jules和平常不一樣心情不好，然后幫cassie引開男友，最后安慰心情糟糕的RUE。即使是在嘈雜的舞會上，她也幾乎關(guān)注到了每一個好朋友的狀態(tài)。真的就是超級溫柔體貼大姐姐，雖然她的年齡在里面并不是最大的。還有就是在RUE狂躁癥而不自知的時候，RUE凌晨打電話給她，她完全沒有發(fā)飆，只是說了句“你這是當(dāng)局者迷”點醒了RUE。所以，我的內(nèi)心堅定地站rexi?( 'ω' )?

最后一集，大家都在整理著自己的情感關(guān)系。只有l(wèi)exi一直坐在椅子上，看著人來人往。她托著腮問cassie，大家都是怎么選擇戀愛對象的呢？這種感覺真的很小孩子，很天真很單純。不過見過朋友們這么多刺激經(jīng)歷的lexi其實也是明白很多的吧~在非常有限的鏡頭里，我眼里的lexi其實是一個很有主見很有想法的女孩。最后，我覺得《euphoria》里最酷的小天使lexi和最酷的小惡魔RUE應(yīng)該在一起！

多蘭最近在自己的ins上分享了對這部劇的觀后感。

真的是超級認(rèn)真有沒有(>﹏<)

和東抄西湊完成老師影評作業(yè)的我們完全不一樣啊啊啊

———————————————————————

以下是我結(jié)合有道翻譯為大家翻譯的多蘭獨家劇評：

雖然我不是一定要在這里分享我喜愛的東西，但分享也是一種樂趣。不分享就不能體現(xiàn)出我對它的愛。 幾周前，《亢奮》這部劇在我的生活中悄然出現(xiàn)了。我在一個流媒體平臺上看到了它的海報。我也在Instagram上看到了一些關(guān)于它的廣告和剪輯。 一天晚上我回家看了第一集。一開始我不確定自己能不能理解，因為我比劇中的當(dāng)代角色年齡要大一些，盡管我們有一些相同的習(xí)慣，但我們的生活并不相同。但在第二集的后半段，我們清楚地明白了這部劇的含義。 我真的不在乎自己是否正確，對我來說，這就是這部劇的內(nèi)涵:創(chuàng)傷，以及我們處理它的方式。克服它，并把它變成別的東西。創(chuàng)傷很可能使我們自我厭惡、憎恨、孤獨和上癮。我對這四種情感都很熟悉。當(dāng)然，這部戲的拍攝非常華麗，有著奢華的夜景和溫文爾雅的霓虹燈。但最讓我產(chǎn)生共鳴的是每個人的掙扎，以及他們在這么小的年紀(jì)，為了克服這些掙扎而壓抑或屈服于其中的暴力?？吹竭@些渴望自由和愛的年輕人，在缺乏愛的情況下生存，或者深陷于“糟糕的愛”，這一切令人心碎。 現(xiàn)在，讓我高興的是，我對所有的演員都充滿敬畏。劇中的每一個音符都直擊人心，每一個眼神和每一聲歡笑都令人動容。Zendaya, Sydney Sweeney, Barbie Ferreira, Alexa Demie, Hunter Schafer, Jacob Elordi, Algie Smith, Maude Apatow, Angus Cloud, Alanna Ubach, Lukas Gage…制作設(shè)計師、藝術(shù)導(dǎo)演和電影攝影師創(chuàng)造了這個糖果般頹廢的世界，如此健康連貫，如此具有諷刺意味的美麗。很明顯，山姆·萊文森的作品，寫作，以及他的精準(zhǔn)，他的思想和心靈如此清晰而溫柔地滲透在這部劇中。 在節(jié)目的最后一個場景中，我感到了無法抑制的喜悅，這讓我想起了《木蘭花》中的角色突然唱起歌來的感覺。我對他的大膽和真誠感到震驚，甚至是最不安的欽佩。我們看到像《亢奮》這樣的劇，覺得生活可以變得更好，有更多創(chuàng)造的沖動。 所以，真心感謝你們。

（如果翻譯有誤歡迎指出?。?/p>

————————————————————————

最后，希望大家都能真正看懂這部劇，過上更好的人生。

曾經(jīng)的我 幸福滿足 I was once happy, content, 徜徉在只屬于我的羊水之中 sloshing around in my own private, primordial pool. 結(jié)果有一天 由于不可抗拒的因素 Then one day, for reasons beyond my control, 我母親萊絲麗的子宮 I was repeatedly crushed... 一次又一次對我殘忍地施加壓力 over and over by the cruel cervix of my mother, Leslie. 我頑強地抵抗了 卻終敵不過大自然 I put up a good fight, but I lost, 這是我人生第一次敗仗 之后更是節(jié)節(jié)敗退

我厭棄所有人 除了你 I hate everyone else in the world but you.

茱爾絲 你自殘嗎 And, Jules, do you self-injure? 事實上 茱爾絲討厭自己 The truth was, Jules hated herself. 她討厭自己大腦的運作方式 She hated how her brain worked... 她的大腦會因一個想法而卡住 the way it would get stuck on a thought, 從而噎到自己 like choking. 專注于當(dāng)下 All right. Keep present. 大腦會陷入無盡的循環(huán) And it would just play on an infinite loop, 直到她停止思考 until she couldn't think 無法呼吸 瀕臨死亡 or breathe or stand to be alive. 克服并非易事 茱爾絲 This is hard, Jules. 你一定可以挺過去 You're going to get through it, okay? 但她不僅討厭自己的大腦 She didn't just hate her brain, though. 她還討厭自己的身體 但不是每個部位都討厭 She hated her body, not every part, 只討厭肩膀 手臂 just her shoulders, and her arms, 雙手 and her hands. 還有胸部 腹部 大腿 Also her chest, her stomach, her thighs. 她最討厭膝蓋了 Her knees were the worst. 還很討厭腳踝和肥大的雙腳 Plus her ankles, and her big, fucking, stupid feet. 她討厭自己的人生 并非因為過得不好 She hated her life, not because it was bad, 而是因為 痛恨自己的大腦和身體之人 but because when you hate your brain and your body, 很難享受人生

每當(dāng)她被虐得很慘時... And whenever anything got too uncomfortable... 茱爾絲就假裝自己靈魂出竅 Jules would just imagine that she wasn't really herself, 她其實在旁觀別人的生活 and this wasn't really her life. 她只是虛構(gòu)作品中的一個虛構(gòu)人物 She was just a character in a book or a movie or a show. 一切都是假象 即便是真 又能如何呢 That none of it was real, and if it was, how did it matter? 這具身體本就不屬于她 It's not like her body ever really belonged to her in the first place.

我沒有特別喜歡的事情 There's nothing I'm really passionate about. 沒有非要做或說的事 You know, like, I'm not dying to say or do anything, really. 每次我向大家坦露心跡 And every time I admit that to people, 他們都會覺得這樣很可悲 但是... they're like, "Oh, my gosh, that's so sad." But... 我覺得多數(shù)人都是如此 I think that's the case for most people. 我媽是如此 You know? Like, when I look at my mom or... 我同學(xué)也是如此 like, the kids at my school-- 從他們社交媒體上的動態(tài)就能看出來 like, their profiles or their posts and their Tumblr rants... 大家也都過得稀里糊涂 迷茫無助 you realize they're all just fucked up, too... and lost. 只是他們都得掩飾真相... They just have a reason to mask it... 為了不讓家人擔(dān)憂 whether it be, like, their, their families 拴住男友 博取關(guān)注 or their boyfriends or their hashtag activism. 他們都只是借助表面的光鮮亮麗 And they're just reaching for something -粉飾人生的虛無 -小茹... - to make it all seem meaningfu

麥迪從小就很了解自己 Maddy knew who she was from a very early age. 從麥迪記事以來 她就是萬人迷 For as long as Maddy could remember, everybody loved her.

她不知自己為何受歡迎 She never knew exactly what it was. 她只知道自己很特殊 She just knew that she had something special, 氣質(zhì)迷幻朦朧 something intangible, 魅力無人能及 something immeasurable.

她因此充滿自信 And it gave her confidence

她也是因此熱愛選美 That's why she loved pageantry, 因為冠軍不必容貌傾城 高挑精干 because you didn't have to be the prettiest or the tallest 也不必金發(fā)碧眼 膚如凝脂 or the blondest or the whitest. 自信閃耀就夠了

You just had to have fucking confidence.嘉年華當(dāng)晚 和盧克·卡斯滕打炮時 So the night of the carnival, while fucking Luke Kasten, 凱特頓悟了 Kat had an epiphany. 她居然上了盧克·卡斯滕 She was fucking Luke Kasten, 那他媽可是盧克·卡斯滕啊 Luke motherfucking Kasten. 沒上過東高的人可能不知道... And for those of you who didn't go to East Highland... 盧克·卡斯滕可是男神 Luke Kasten was a fucking god. 他畢業(yè)多年 可學(xué)校里依然有他的傳說 I mean, he graduated years ago and people still talk about him. 他有我見過最大的雞雞 He has the biggest dick I've ever seen, 他上我時 我一直盯著他看 and I was looking at him while he was fucking me. 他射精時 I could see his face scrunching up 我看到他的臉皺成一團 when he was coming all over my stomach, 我突然就頓悟了 and I had this, like, realization, you know, like, this epiphany. 無論這個人有多酷帥性感 That no matter how cool, or, or sexy 不論他在你眼中有多聰明 or, or smart you think a guy is, 其實都卑微渺小得可悲可憐 they're actually just fucking pathetic.

我一直試圖減弱自己的存在感 my whole life, all I've tried to do is to take up less space.

企圖避開那幫男人 Try to hide from guys, like, who might, like, 因為我經(jīng)過時 他們會對朋友悄悄吐槽 whisper to their friend under their breath as I walked by. 我這一生 I've spent my whole life 都在擔(dān)心大家會發(fā)現(xiàn)我是個胖妞 afraid people were gonna find out that I was fat. 但說實話 根本沒人在意 But honestly, who gives a shit?

無所畏懼的胖女孩所向披靡 There's nothing more powerful than a fat girl who doesn't give a fuck.

高中的情誼轉(zhuǎn)瞬即逝 并非天長地久 Nothing in high school lasts forever. 你該見見她 You should meet her.

Are you kidding me? 你被罰下了 You're out of the game. 沖動就會輸球 You get emotional, you lose. 動怒就會輸球 You get angry, you lose. -爸 他說我是... -無關(guān)緊要 - Dad, he called me-- - I don't give a good goddamn. 你覺得他為什么偏偏說你呢 Why do you think he's talking to you in the first place? -因為他... -因為他想激怒你 - Because he-- - Because he's trying to get a rise out of you. 擾亂你的思緒 讓你分心 Trying to make you upset, lose focus. 他在挑戰(zhàn)你的底線 這就是生存法則 That's his game. That's the world's game. 他們不斷逼你 They want to push on you, 逗弄你 考驗?zāi)愕臉O限 Poke on you, see exactly how much you can take. 極限會決定你能走多遠(yuǎn) And how much you can take is what will ultimately define you. 因為應(yīng)對之道可以衡量人的品性 Because the measure of a man is in how he reacts. 我該如何應(yīng)對 How am I supposed to react? 將自己的所有情緒 By taking everything you feel, 挫敗感 憤怒 狂暴 all your frustrations, your anger, your rage, 統(tǒng)統(tǒng)收起 you bottle it up, 守住本心 you take your position, 當(dāng)情緒累積至頂峰 and when that snap comes, 將其化作噴薄而出的動力 you let it explode.

她幾乎每次都會心軟答應(yīng) And she almost always said yes. 盡管她很不情愿 也會照做 Even though it didn't always make her feel good. 她知道 多數(shù)男生跟她分手后 And she knew that most guys, after she broke up with them, 都會散播她的性愛視頻和裸照

would always share those photos or videos. 她剛發(fā)現(xiàn)時 恐慌心悸 The first time she found out, she had a panic attack, 她甚至想吞撲熱息痛自殺 and wanted to swallow a whole bottle of Tylenol. 但最終打消了自殺的念頭 But she didn't. 因為大家頂多言語上對她諷刺挖苦 Because, I mean, what's the worst thing anybody could say to her? 無非就是嘲笑她給渣男口交而已 That she gave a blowjob to a guy who didn't deserve it? 而且 她覺得等到畢業(yè)求職那會兒 And she figured by the time she was out of college and looking for a job, 絕大多數(shù)人都有過裸照的黑歷史了 99 percent of the population would have leaked nudes, anyway.

一想到要站起來 The thought of having to stand up, 移動35英尺 每走一步要調(diào)動172塊肌肉 exert 172 muscles each step for 35 feet, 就為了坐在冰涼的陶瓷坐便器上 just so I can sit on cold porcelain 日復(fù)一日地排出體內(nèi)毒素 and piss out toxins over and over again for the rest of my life 我就覺得人生是一個漫長且磨人的玩笑 makes the whole concept of living feel like one long, sadistic joke. 但抑郁最磨人的一點是 But the absolute worst part of depression 你明知自己抑郁了 is that even though you know you're depressed, 卻依然無可救藥地越陷越深 you're unable to stop yourself from getting worse

抑郁的另一癥狀就是 The other thing about depression is 讓人喪失時間概念 it kind of collapses time. 突然之間 全部記憶混雜交織 Suddenly, you find your whole days blending together 無窮無盡 令人窒息 to create one endless and suffocating loop. 抑郁后 人會試圖回想愉悅的瞬間 So you find yourself trying to remember the things that made you happy. 但大腦會一點點蠶食欣快的回憶 But slowly, your brain begins to erase every memory that ever brought you joy. 最終 And eventually, 腦中僅剩人生中沉悶壓抑的記憶 all you can think about is how life has always been this way. 人就會日漸消沉 And will only continue to be this way.

曾經(jīng)有個心理醫(yī)生說 我壓抑的狀態(tài)會起起落落 I had a therapist once who said that these states will wax and wane. 我媽因此松了一口氣 Which gave my mother relief, 因為就算我犯病了 because it meant that in the bad times, 總也會好起來 there would be good times. 但她也因此焦灼難安 But it also gave her anxiety 因為就算我一時沒事 because it meant that in the good times, 總也有抑郁發(fā)作的一天 there would be bad times. 我一直很不解 It always confused me, 因為我不懂"起落"的意思 because I didn't really know what it meant. 但聽起來比我自己的形容更讓人安心 But it did sound a lot calmer than the way I would describe it. 我得繼續(xù)服藥 There you go. How you feel? Okay? 我知道你現(xiàn)在很低落 寶貝 I know you're feeling low right now, baby. 但你沒有故態(tài)復(fù)萌 說明你的癥狀有所緩解 But the fact that you didn't turn back means you're gettin' better. 沒錯 It does. 一定是這樣 It does. 當(dāng)然了 我之后才領(lǐng)悟到 Granted, I didn't realize until later "起起落落"的真正含義 what waxing and waning implied. 抑郁無法根除 會反復(fù)發(fā)作 That these feelings were fixed and constant 我的余生都將與抑郁作伴 and would never end for the rest of my life.

我住院觀察了三天 And kept me there for three days. 其實住院可好了 It was actually really nice. 我超喜歡醫(yī)院 I love hospitals. 要是余生都能在醫(yī)院度過 我絕對沒意見 If I could spend the rest of my life in a hospital, I would. 因為住院時 Because when you're in a hospital, 可以做個米蟲 you have zero responsibilities. 醫(yī)護人員會保證你吃飽睡好 身體棒棒 They make sure you eat, sleep, stay hydrated, 如遇不測 醫(yī)生總能及時出現(xiàn) and if anything bad happens, there's always a doctor nearby. 謝謝 Thank you. 發(fā)生大規(guī)模槍擊案時 待在醫(yī)院最明智了 It's also the best place to be in the event of a mass shooting, 只要外科醫(yī)生沒死光光就行 unless the gunman kills all the surgeons. 關(guān)鍵是 我在醫(yī)院無憂無慮 The point is, I had zero anxiety.

我昨晚寫信時 and as I sat down last night to write it, 忍不住回想你出生那天的場景 I couldn't stop thinking about the day you were born. 我第一次將你抱入臂彎 Holding you in my arms for the first time, 憐愛地看著你 looking down at you, 看著你可愛動人的小臉 your sweet, beautiful face... 我這輩子從未如此充滿愛意 歡欣愉悅 I had never felt so much love and joy in my entire life. 于是我想到... And I thought that... 若是那一刻 有人能提醒我該多好 what if in that moment I heard a voice, 通曉萬物的人生旁白對我低語 some omniscient narrator who said, "接下來將會如此" "Here's what's going to happen. "你的女兒將會風(fēng)趣幽默 聰明伶俐 開朗大方" "Your daughter is gonna be funny, and smart, and outgoing, "她的靈氣從小便會顯現(xiàn)" You'll see it instantly, from a young age." "她將會魅力四射 廣交朋友" "She'll be charismatic and make friends easily." "她將會溫柔善良 心思細(xì)膩" "She'll be kind and sensitive. "細(xì)膩到敏感" "Maybe too sensitive. "她不會是個乖乖女" "She won't be an easy child. "她會很叛逆" She'll struggle." "因此 你將很難看懂她" "And in turn, you'll struggle to understand her." "你將跟不上她的思維" "To understand what's going on inside of her head. "無法理解那些難以擺脫的夢魘" "The night terrors that can't be interrupted. "很多時候 晚飯后" "The times after dinner where "她會坐在餐桌旁" "She'll just sit at the kitchen table "一遍遍數(shù)著天花板磚的數(shù)量and count the tiles over and over, "數(shù)到自己上氣不接下氣" "Until she hyperventilates. "你會用盡全力擁她入懷 安慰她" "To fight to hold her in your arms, to tell her it's okay." "你們將難以平靜 她會摔打東西 大吼大叫" "To calm down. The kicking. The screaming. "她會害怕受傷" "The anxiety of being harmed. "她會日夜煎熬" "The transitions from day to night, "從家中到學(xué)校 每頓飯皆是如此" "From home to school, from meal to meal. "她會擔(dān)心失去父母和妹妹" Of losing her mother or father or little sister." "她害怕會孤苦伶仃" - "Of being alone." 我很喜歡她 I really like her. "她會恐慌發(fā)作 情緒波動 迷惑不解 精神分裂" "The panic attacks, mood swings, confusion, disorganization "她會憤怒狂躁" "And all that rage. "不僅生你的氣 也會惱恨自己" "Not just at you, but at herself. "最煎熬的是..." "And the tough part i "她無法自救 而你也將束手無策" "you'll feel as helpless to help her as she does herself." "你將犯下大大小小的錯誤" "You'll make mistakes. Small ones and big ones. "你會慌忙求助 病急亂投醫(yī)" "You'll look for help from people who aren't helpful. "你求助之人或許根本不了解情況" "Or who don't actually understand what's happening." "內(nèi)疚感將因此伴你終生" "And the guilt will never leave you." "但若你保持鎮(zhèn)定 溫柔耐心" "But if you remain calm and patient, "若你能仔細(xì)聆聽" "If you listen closely, "你便能漸漸理解她" "理解她為何重復(fù)地數(shù)了一遍又一遍" "The counting, the repetition, "理解她對于對稱的執(zhí)著" "the need for symmetry. "若你睡前親吻了她的左臉" "That if you kiss her left cheek before bed, "一定也要親吻她的右臉" "You have to kiss her right cheek. "還有額頭 下巴" "And her forehead. Then her chin. "因為這樣才平衡穩(wěn)定" "That it's about balance, stability. "這樣她才能疏導(dǎo)情緒 捋順?biāo)季w" "The need to organize her feelings and thoughts, so... "這樣她才能平靜下來" she can breathe easier." "你將得到片刻的喘息" "And there will be moments of relief, "你們倆都能松一口氣" "In her and in you. "這些時刻平靜安寧 順心滿足" "Moments that feel so normal, and calm, and rewarding that... "你會希望平淡的幸福能夠天長地久" "You'll find yourself praying they last forever. "可她還小" "Even though she's only a child, "糟心事還在后面呢 "And all the hard parts have yet to even come. "16歲時" "And at the age of 16, "她會吸毒過量" "She'll overdose, "昏迷四天" "Spend four days in a coma, "生死未卜" "And you won't know if she'll live or die. "但等她醒來" "But when she wakes up, "她會有機會戒毒" "She'll be given the opportunity to get clean, "改過自新" "To become a different person, "完善自己" "A better person. "但有一點你無能為力" "Here's the toughest part. "不論你怎么說 怎么做 怎么想" "No matter what you say, or do, or wish, "決定權(quán)都在她手中" "The decision will be all hers. "你只能心懷希望" "And all you can do is hope "希望她能給自己一個重新來過的機會"

凱特 Kat. 萬一現(xiàn)在就是我們?nèi)松母吖鈺r刻呢 What if these are, like, the big moments in life? 我媽總說 Like, my mom always talks about 高中是她人生的里程碑式高光時刻 how high school was like this big, monumental part of her life. 可她都半老徐娘了 居然還對高中念念不忘 But I cannot imagine being 40 and looking back at this, like, "Wow." 因為多數(shù)人在高中達(dá)到了人生巔峰 Yeah, but that's because most people peak in high school. 我肯定還沒達(dá)到巔峰... I definitely haven't peaked, so... 我感覺自己還沒長大呢 I feel like I'm not even a person yet. 我也就攀登到巔峰的四分之一吧 Yeah, I'm definitely at, like, 25 percent peakness. 我好像達(dá)到巔峰了 I feel like I'm at a hundred. 但我還能升得更高 But I can definitely get to 150. 講真 我都沒想到自己能撐到現(xiàn)在 Honestly, I never thought I'd make it this far. 什么意思 What do you mean? 我總是提心吊膽 惶惶不安 I don't know. I just always had, like, this overwhelming anxiety 我總覺得一定會出事 that something bad would happen. 說實話 去年夏天 In all fairness, last summer, 我有三周一直以為你死了 there were, like, three weeks where I thought you were dead.

失眠了一整晚又刷了一遍。看似放蕩糜爛的高中生活背后實則隱藏著無數(shù)支離破碎的家庭，無聲的暴力在每個人年輕的心靈中種下了種子。這種子隨著年齡的增長慢慢在心中發(fā)芽，這過程中種子缺少陽光和水，長成某些扭曲的植物；也就是說他們?nèi)鄙僬嬲?，健康的關(guān)心和愛。

而每個少年只是在尋找愛的路上走的有點偏了，毒癮，約炮，操縱與被操縱，但這只是一顆顆渴望被愛的心。在人們都深陷自己的泥潭時，互舔傷口則顯得更加動人，就如在貧瘠的沙漠里找水，在枯萎的樹上尋找鮮果。這種情感流動中有一種病態(tài)與脆弱的糾纏，但是在結(jié)尾也不失穿過烏云望彩虹的希望。

感覺編劇真的很厲害，可以把這些畸形的情感拿捏的如此準(zhǔn)確和刻骨銘心，當(dāng)然我也在里面或多或少看見了自己。兩年前第一次看的時候，Jue被黑幫大佬強行喂毒high了之后說I’m so happy，F(xiàn)ez在一旁守著她，我哭了很久。

年少缺失的愛，先要用很多很多似愛非愛的東西填補，再要用很久很久找回來。

*******EP6feedback*******

可笑的是，惡行總是比善行要更高效、更令人滿意。我們總想得到一針見血的解決方法，可以打個響指就把所有麻煩都送上青云。不會有人告訴你積善成德而神明自得，也不會有人一次次地善言忠告。在一個年輕得要命的時候，很少有人知道怎么去做決定，也很少有人對自己的選擇感到確信無比。

但說實話，不論年齡，又有哪個人不是如此愚蠢，如此，無助？

在整整五集的偷偷摸摸、欲休還迎之后，Nate終于打破謎云，確立了自己全劇第一渣男的地位。對于這個形象我一直很迷惑：他是深柜嗎？他有PTSD嗎？他是不是性觀念扭曲？他到底喜不喜歡Jules？他到底愛不愛Maddie？他是不是精神分裂？第六集之后，我遺憾地發(fā)現(xiàn)：

Nate只是一個普通人，一個惡心、仇世、仇女、自卑、自大、空虛的普通人。

他和Maddie的關(guān)系中，他始終是被動，卑微的那個；也許他喜歡過Jules，但那只不過是不屑的挑釁；他只是在尋找童年缺失的安慰和自尊，初嘗暴力的甜頭后，就無法自拔地沉醉于權(quán)力帶來的假象。他覺得自己什么都能做，自己什么都能做到。

真可悲。

但更可憐的是Jules。我們有時候會去做一些自己都覺得駭人的事，只是因為害怕未知背后的未知。但無論我們走了多遠(yuǎn)，見了多少人，這種虛無的恐懼感卻絲毫不會減少；恰恰相反，它會夜以繼日地鉆出你的大腦，把所見一切都當(dāng)作不屑一顧的廉價玩物。

——我把它叫做年輕的無漫躁動。

所以我們希望一切都會好起來。但“好起來”到底是什么意思？他們不知道——他們沒有一個人知道。最簡單的頭腦，會希望這種快樂能一個激靈跳出來，就像磕了藥一樣。

:)